Feb 24, 2010

Day 1: approximately 12 snoozes

The idea for this blog occurred to me on the bus this morning. I normally drive to work, which takes about 15 minutes on a good day, so I'm in no rush to leave in the morning. Sometimes, the wifey-poo needs the car for various girl things, and I'm stuck on the smelly old bus. I don't mind TOO much, but it takes friggin' forever because of having to transfer to an infrequent bus when I get downtown - this means that on bus days I have to either a) rush around in the morning, or b) wake up earlier, which is pretty much the most impossible thing I can imagine.

This morning I rushed like mad to get out the door, only to miss my bus because my stupid 1964 Eterna-Matic Birks watch (grandpa's) loses about a minute a day, making me 5 minutes late for pretty much everything. This made me miss my transfer, so I spent a total of 30 minutes just waiting for busses - this is unacfuckingceptable for a busy guy like myself, so I resolved to finally quit the snooze button. But for real this time, I totally mean it.

I've been wrestling with a snooze button addiction since my second year of university. Before that, I'd pop out of bed at the first buzz, eat some food, then make fun of my sister for hitting her snooze button 12 times before getting out of bed. Now I'm her, minus the boobs. Ok, I've got the boobs, but they're not girl-boobs. Anyway, once the addiction set in, it's been extremely hard to kick.

I once tried getting one of those old-timey alarm clocks, with the very very very loud bells - these don't have a snooze button. Within a week I would turn it off, reset it for "approximately some time in the future" and go back to sleep, and do this 3 or 4 times before finally getting out of bed, late.

Another time, I took my digital alarm clock, opened it and completely dismantled the snooze button components, rendering the button useless. Again, within a week I was waking up and just resetting the little bugger for 9 minutes later.

That's the back story, more on quitting addictions, and how shitty that can be, tomorrow.

(the reason I wrote "approximately" in today's title is because I wasn't keeping track this morning. Tomorrow, hard numbers. But don't worry, no math)


  1. 12 snoozes? By standard alarm-clock math that's like 108 minutes = almost two hours? Yikes. I've been known to over-snooze but it's usually only 3 or 4 times. Also I thought this column was going to be about falling asleep on the bus and waking up with your head on another passenger's shoulder, or waking when your eye hits the window-opener-lever-thingy, or when the bus arrives at the depot at the end of the route. Oh that's my blog not yours.

  2. As the famous snoozy sister in this story, I've found a cool system lately. It's an alarm that let's you choose just how much snooze you want, for up to an hour. 7am alarm, resets to 7:40, then I can snooze only once or twice more, to be up by 8. And this works. For you, I think quitting the teddy bear might help ;)

  3. @ TenVolt: alarm set for 6:30, rolled out of bed at 8:20 - this is the norm

    @ Allison: using your alarm clock would be like quitting booze but still drinking lite beer. It's gotta be all or nothing for me